Profound Sadness

Profound sadness today washing like waves over me....I'm never really free from it, just some moments are more intense than others. The thought that this is really happening is hitting me over and over, my life is forever changed. I'm not sure what to say or what to do. I have this sense that I should be doing something but I have no idea what that something is. I don't know how to lose this sadness that is attached to me. I wish I were one of those people who could draw the curtains and get lost in TV shows and movies but I'm not. My mind never stops, it doesn't matter what I am doing, my mind is still running like a computer screen with 100 tabs open in the background.